Tuesday, January 04, 2005

The answer to the question: Does Medifast Really Work?

Yes, Medifast does really work. In a little over 9 weeks, I lost 60 pounds and was racing towards my goal weight. Medifast worked. But what didn't work was my self esteem and my resolve. The confidence and pride to realize that I deserved to be thin and happy.

Well, a lot has happened. I purchased my very own home which I am at right now as I type. It took a while, but now there is absolutely nothing in my home that is edible that does not say "Medifast" on the cover. I haven't taken a peek at the damage I've done over the past few weeks while eating out of control. But I know its bad because my clothes are not fitting the same. Last night I looked at myself and felt disgust. See, the thing about me is that I am not able to eat normally. No matter how hard I try. This is not something that just began to happen--I've always had a problem with putting the fork down. Even as a child. Why? I don't know. But I do know that when I'm doing something low carb that insanity is relieved---up until the time when I decide to take that "first bite."

Anyhow, I can't ramble on too much because I have a lot of work to do. I'm just glad to be back, and I am determined now to get this done. My self esteem is shot, and if I continue on like this, I will never enter another healthy relationship again. When it comes to men, I want to be able to choose from the cream of the crop, not from the barrel of unwanted losers. I've realized this firmly in my mind over the past few weeks--I NEED to lose weight if I ever want that dream life. I'm 25, and will turn 26 in October. I'm not getting any younger. I have to trim down ASAP and start dating again (maybe later in the year when I'm set in my routine). Then maybe have one child, and live happily ever after. The fat is keeping me from doing this---I MUST LOSE THE FAT!

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